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Hot Married Sex, How To Create A Work/Sex/Life Balance!

Are you doing it?

So…sex and marriage! How often are those two things getting into bed together? Today we chat about married or long term relationships and sex – you want to know how to have more sex in marriage and how to create a better work/sex/life balance? We got you!

Are we doing it?

Striking that all-important balance can be tricky; you may need to think outside the box – and the bed! Finding the energy to keep those juices flowing can sometimes feel like an uphill battle, and if you have been with someone for years, sex can sit in the too-hard (or not hard at all) basket for way longer than it should. A healthy marriage is one where you are getting your needs met, where you are reaching goals together and where you are an individual with a solid support team you can count on. A big part of a healthy relationship is physical intimacy, and although most people want to be hitting sex and marriage goals, some of us just need a nudge in the right direction.

So, where did the sex go?

It can be uncomfortable to realise that you need to find out how to have more sex in marriage. Once upon a time, you were mad for each other 24/7, you made your friends sick (with envy) by sneaking off to do the dirty instead of staying for dinner parties, you did it all day at the weekend, and nothing was easier than dropping your pants and getting all over each other. So what happened? While there are no solid rules about sex and marriage, how often you should be doing it, or how to create the kind of sex life your particular marriage enjoys, we do have a few tips that we can share to get you started towards that elusive balance.

Tired, or tired of each other?

Domesticity can be a passion killer. Cleaning up after other people blows, children are exhausting, and realising how often your beloved leaves their shit lying all over the bathroom floor can send lust screaming for the door. While it’s lovely to have someone to snuggle up with at the end of a hard day, one tried, and true method for injecting a bit of heat back into your married sex life is the old adage ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder.’ In other words, you need to take breaks from each other! If you think back to the last time you had a weekend away without the hubby/wife, you may recall that getting home was exciting, and some of the best married sex happens after you have slept apart for a few nights. If you can’t swing a night away, aim for going out apart and meeting up at the end of the night. You will have something to talk about, and it’s exciting to know your partner doesn’t need you every minute of the day.

Eat healthily and exercise.

While it may seem like a no-brainer, it can often be a struggle. Relationship weight is definitely a thing, and while you might not be consciously throwing in the towel and letting it all hangout, unhealthy habits seem to form when we are comfortable. If you are smashing a giant bowl of carbonara and a packet of chips on the couch together every night, the chances are pretty high that sex and marriage are not the combos you are enjoying for dessert. Try having a light early dinner, then take a walk together instead of vegging out. Think about heading out with a friend at lunchtime to try a gym class, or get yourself some good bikes and make the weekend all about exploring the neighbourhood. We reckon that with some small adjustments in your diet and exercise habits, before long, you will be exploring each other’s bodies again.

Sex Toys, Sex, and Marriage

Throw some sex toys at it! If you are looking to reignite that horny fire with your long term love, you can’t go wrong with a sex toy. This is no longer considered particularly kinky, and many sexually active adults are into using sex toys for casual play or partner play. If you are wondering how to have more sex in marriage, this may be an awesome way to freshen things up in the bedroom (and there’s a gift involved!) Open up a sex toy online shop and browse for toys together, flick each other a link to Erotic Stories to enjoy together or even treat yourself to some adult movies to get some fires started again between you. Opening the door to sharing and exploring some sex toy fantasies can be really helpful when it comes to combining sex and marriage, as well as being quite fun to show a renewed interest in your partner and their sexual needs. With sex toys and flirtation, you’re a new couple, baby. 

If you have to ask…

Sex and marriage, how often should we be doing it? If you have to ask, you are probably not doing it enough. It’s important; you want to want it, and it’s time to work a little harder to have it. Try early nights together; you may find you can discuss things naked that are tricky to discuss clothed! A tip that is popular with sex therapists is to touch each other without the end goal of having sex – and we reckon that alone might just be the thing to restart that fire in your marriage! Just because that isn’t the end goal when you start…doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to have it be the result. 

If you are wondering how to have more sex in marriage, it means you want it, and wanting it is the first step towards figuring out how to create a work/sex/life balance together. There’s no shame in talking about reigniting interest in sex with your partner; it’s natural to feel a pause, and any couple you look at has most likely been through it! Welcome to the team working on getting it on! 

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